Kate Elizabeth Winslet CBE is a British actress known for Distressed Period Socialite Won't Stop Crying and Pissy Woman is Pissy: God She's Over It. This is a Full Of Beef starring Nova McCracken who apparently hasn't seen anything she's in but agrees with me in saying that's she's one of the finest actresses our country has ever produced.
2021-08-23 18:10:00 +0000 UTC View Post
Our Eurovision-soaked performance from Bournemouth's Pride festival 2021.
2021-08-22 16:58:13 +0000 UTC View Post
START YOUR LAWNMOWERS!
Submit your contestants in a DM to the @novympiapatreon Instagram before Wednesday September 1st including:
- A great photo of your piece of shet
- Contestant name
- Bio (including what makes your contestant the next Grand Master Arsehole)
- Hometown
- Patreon Username
Season 3 will be a cast of 10 and will start mid-September.
May the best dickhead... bbBBEEEST DICKHEAD WIIIN.
2021-08-18 21:25:16 +0000 UTC View Post
Apparently her real name is Susan. When she was 14, she decided to change it after seeing a "Mrs. Sigourney Howard" in The Great Gatsby - not realising that it was the oldy-timey way of referring to a married woman and that it was therefore a male name. Anyway, the bird is JUST exquisite and I can bet yer lower arse that you feel the same way.
2021-08-15 19:05:55 +0000 UTC View Post
We decided for whatever ungodly reason to let Char bestow her delicate face onto ours in the form of the most suspicious makeup class you'll ever see.
2021-08-13 00:09:58 +0000 UTC View Post
Natasha Bedingfield is a British singer songwriter who (for at least 5 years when I was a child) I believed to be her brother Daniel Bedingfield as per the rumour that he had undergone gender reassignment. Truth was he was taking time out to recover from an accident while she very briefly took over the world. She's got some really good songs in her repertoire but does anyone remember her but at all?
2021-08-07 23:01:01 +0000 UTC View Post
PART 1 of our epic adventure as May and Cody as we fight a vacuum cleaner and an angry handbag.
2021-08-06 21:15:13 +0000 UTC View Post
...and ends up looking like Aunty Jo.
2021-08-06 21:13:21 +0000 UTC View PostHello, puffins!
This is just a note to say that casting for season 3 of the race hasn’t started yet.
We’ve been getting a lot of messages about how to apply etc. but we haven’t got to it thus far. We’ll put up a video this week detailing how to enter so don’t worry - you’re all still in with a chance towards becoming Novympia’s Next Grandmaster Arsehole! 🍾
Also a reminder - all patron tiers will be able to apply and watch the race.
2021-08-02 13:24:45 +0000 UTC View Post
Yes, Twins. I've had some personal experience knowing twins and I've always been fascinated. There's some pretty sus psychoanalysing in this but init interesting - I'm expecting comments because I know some of you must be a twin.
Identical Strangers Doc: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i1nz5Bkpmcw
Twin Stranger Website: https://www.twinstrang...
2021-07-31 23:01:02 +0000 UTC View Post
Thanks to beloved cultist Gabriel, we were able to spend a balmy afternoon sampling the finest snacks that could be scoured from across Texas, USA.
2021-07-31 21:20:21 +0000 UTC View Post
The Moors Murders were carried out by Ian Brady and Myra Hindley between July 1963 and October 1965, in and around Manchester, England.
It's weird to me that we've never covered this. I've recently watched a TV movie about the whole thing and discovered that infamous murderer Myra Hindley had a sister called Maureen whose life was utterly destroyed when Myra and Ian decided to take their trips to Saddleworth Moor in the 60s, so I'm telling...
2021-07-24 23:00:02 +0000 UTC View Post
Nova, Olympia and Char compete for the gold in the first annual Novympics, a wildly unofficial spinoff to Tokyo 2020.
2021-07-24 20:30:09 +0000 UTC View PostHi guys!
As you probably already know, all Patrons in the "Priest" tier and above get their names added to the Patreon wall, with a shout-out the first time its added. Over the next few weeks we're gonna try to re-jig this wall around a bit to try and fit more names onto less slides, as they're flashing up so quickly now and the wall segment is slowly getting longer and longer 😅
SO, if for whatever reason your profile name is different to the name you would like on the new wall, please make sure you change it to the name you'd...
2021-07-21 18:35:35 +0000 UTC View Post
...and it's a Patrœné Update special! Just a cute check-in to preview this weekend's video spectacular in 30 degree heat and Nova sits down to show her updated Pokemon card collection.
2021-07-21 18:05:19 +0000 UTC View Post
Mekayla Bali was 16 when she disappeared from her Canadian town under suspicious circumstances that, heartbreakingly enough, all lead to human trafficking. I dunno, it seems all too obvious from her behaviour as seen on the various CCTV clips but draw your own conclusions.
FactFaction piece: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8f1kqC6HQF0
2021-07-17 23:00:02 +0000 UTC View Post
Requested by Novympia Cult Elder Karen, who has been legally blind since 1990, we sat down to try and put our makeup on without being able to see ourselves.
2021-07-16 23:38:04 +0000 UTC View Post
...and it's a Full Of Beef starring Nora German. Today yer gerls are sitting down with a chino to discuss everyone's favourite lovely bird next door, Jen Aniston. We come to the conclusion that alongside Lisa Kudrow, she successfully managed to get past the association people have with her character from Friends. Can we tell you a single thing about any of the characters she's played since 2004? Not really. But Gen loves Jen so wanted to talk about Jen on a pod with Lymp and Gen.
2021-07-10 23:00:02 +0000 UTC View Post
As if we have the barefaced nerve to call this a "director's cut" but here we are. Originally a part of "Novympia's House Party", this version has added scenes and CG diamonds and we thought it deserved an HD release since it didn't get much action the first time around.
2021-07-08 22:56:32 +0000 UTC View Post
In an ALARMING twist of fate, NERVON GRANNIS achieved the highest score and won the quiz. Rumour has it she cheated. HOWEVER, our highest scoring patröne was PAUL HOUSBEY with 23 points! Congratulations darling - send us a message with a Novympia tee design and colour and we'll pop it in the post!
Honourable mentions go to Team Les Famès and Evelyn Fox who are no strangers to the top 5 and Dan Kumar who has made the top 5 for the first time. Gavin, Jamie, Sam and Adam also scored 20 out of 30. Excellent work, puffins.
...
2021-07-05 15:10:06 +0000 UTC View Post
Halle Berry is my number 1 pick for phoning up and inviting out for daiquiris. If you've seen Perfect Stranger, you'll understand. She's the one singular woman of colour to win the Academy Award for Best Actress in a Leading Role which is wildly embarrassing for diversity over there at the Academy. She also paved the way for absolutely no one in her bizarre role as Catwoman. It's all very hit and miss but Jesus there's some great hits.
2021-07-03 23:01:01 +0000 UTC View Post
The game starts just after 7pm BST.
All you need is a pen/paper or notepad app. After the quiz finishes you will have a 4 minute window to submit your answers in a DM to us on Patreon or to the @novympiapatreon Instagram.
Teams are allowed but only solo entrants are eligible to win the grand prize of a Novympia t-shirt!
2021-07-03 17:50:15 +0000 UTC View Post
We'll be posting the link to go live shortly before 7pm BST to get settled. All you need is yourself and a notepad!
See you then 😏.
2021-07-03 13:45:46 +0000 UTC View Post
This is worth the pledge alone, surely.
2021-07-02 18:23:12 +0000 UTC View Post
We were gifted some incredible padding shorts and drag bras by Izzy Hard of IzzysBootyque.com and couldn't wait to give them a test drive. She's given us a discount code for you guys - 'NOVYMPIA10' <3
2021-07-02 18:22:58 +0000 UTC View Post
A last tour around the house that we lived in when the patrönes gave us our freedom <3. We loved living at Novympia Heights so we had a final tour to revisit some of the highlights from our time there.
2021-06-29 23:05:36 +0000 UTC View Post
...and it's a Full of Beef starring Nervan Gonnis. Apologies for the slightly inferior sound quality during today's pod but yer gerls were up against a few obstacles. Nevertheless we soldiered through to discuss certainly one of my favourite broads as part of the Inspirational Birds series, Nicole Kidman - who just thrives in red hair.
2021-06-26 23:00:03 +0000 UTC View Post
Nova has started collecting Pokémon cards so we decided to actually sit down and play it which may well never happen again.
2021-06-26 14:03:46 +0000 UTC View Post
This is the first pod from the newly inhabited Novympia Manor, featuring a break from the inspo ladies series to talk about how embarrassing our DIY skills are. Nova is past breaking point, she's developed an eye twitch.
2021-06-21 20:15:57 +0000 UTC View Post
We're still alive and wading through shet like it's Char's bedroom. Including a mini house tour!
2021-06-19 16:25:21 +0000 UTC View Post
